The First Cut

Posted on 18 Jan 2013 @ 4:48am by

1,935 words; about a 10 minute read

Mission: Episode 03 - Frontier
Location: USS Galileo - Deck 2, Stone's quarters
Timeline: MD -1 0005

[ON]

Jeremy returned to his quarters straight from the chance meeting with the Chief Engineer. The first thing he did was take Sidi to the bathroom and into his kennel. Sidi went in quickly enough and Jeremy had enough time to close the door as Sidi turned around. Sidi stared at him through the bars in the door but Jeremy turned away from him.

He left the bathroom and went to the replicator and removed the upper panel. He stopped for a moment knowing what he was about to do was wrong - against several regulations - but...doing what he should do would be worse.

He looked at the panel and exposed circuits and wires hidden by the removed panel. It didn't take long for him to locate and then disable a security control device that controlled what substances the replicator would dispense. More importantly, what notifications would be made at the request for certain items. He pocketed the tool for safekeeping.

Having done that, Jeremy stood in front of the machine and closed his eyes, breathing for just a few moments. "Bandages, five by five, guaze, medical tape, compression wrap," he ordered. As the machine dispensed the items, Jeremy looked up. The small light in the back that would normally indicate an alert was sent to security and medical failed to light. Jeremy took the items from the tray before reinitializing the security override and panel.

Returning to the bathroom, he took off the sweatshirt and the long sleeved shirt under it. Looking at his right arm, and the crimson stained bandage there, he shook his head. He ran hot water into the sink and carefully peeled the tape holding the bandage to his arm away from his skin. The bandage itself stuck due to dried blood. Gritting his teeth, Jeremy tore it free, making sure to hold his arm over the basin.

The basin of water was ruined as blood poured from his arm and into the sink. Worse yet came when he cleaned the large, gaping wounds on his arm. The disinfectant stung miserably and ran pink into the sink.

"I should have this looked at," he said, staring at his torn flesh. The criss cross of scars were old, faded and twisted and of no concern to him. He knew about those - almost forgot they existed (except when it came time to get dressed). The new wounds, when healed, would be just another set of scars among many. One gash went deep and Jeremy could feel it throbbing now that it was exposed. "But if I do..."

He glanced at Sidi, his brown eyes behind the bars of his kennel. If he told anyone that would be the only way he'd see Sidi...until...

He shook his head and refused to think about that. He could come up with a fabrication. A holodeck activity gone wrong. He turned off the safety protocols and miscalculated the danger of the program. If anyone checked, they would see that he had time on the holodeck earlier. He didn't have to tell them what happened. People would believe he deliberately placed himself in danger. Crazy people acted like that all the time and people thought he was crazy.

He shook his head and sighed. It would be lying and he...hated...lying. He would do it for a nobler purpose, but not for his own self-gain.

"But it's not about me," he said to the brown eyes in the kennel. It wasn't exactly a lie. It would be protecting one of his officers. And it was his fault. He was the one that was too slow to get his arm out of the way. "It's what you're trained to do," he continued, talking to the dog because talking to himself was just...crazy.

He sighed as he performed another round of disinfectant on the open wounds. "I need to have this seen to," he said, worrying about infection and aggravating it further. If he didn't go soon, they may not be able to do anything about it. "I won't let them know," he said wrapping his arm in a towel and squatting in front of the cage. "It was my fault, boy. I should have been faster. I shouldn't have been playing that game with you. You didn't mean to hurt me. You were just doing what you're trained to do. I should have been better. The manual warned that this would happen. 'Not a matter of if a handler will be bit by his MWD but a matter of when'." Jeremy quoted the passage from the manual that served as his instruction on being a dog handler. It was necessary, at some point, for this to happen. Jeremy had to assert his dominance and let Sidi know that he was the alpha of their relationship. Without it happening, then they couldn't form a working partnership. Sidi had to know who was in charge, indisputably. Jeremy had to be in charge.

Really, a few bites were just a small price to pay to get it done and over with. Sidi knew Jeremy was in charge now. But Jeremy was still worried that others wouldn't understand it the same way. He could show them the manual and the words written there - but people were too clouded in their thinking. They were too caught up in what other people thought of them. Jeremy was freed of that problem. He saw the logic in what had to happen. It was done now, though. Sidi submitted.

Jeremy stood. "You've got to be quiet while I'm gone though, okay? No whining or barking. You can't wake up Lieutenant Panne who is in the next room over. She'll send someone over to complain and...well...they may not understand why I've got you locked away in my quarters and not with me. So be quiet, okay?"

Sidi barked once. Jeremy lowered his head and squatted down. "Please, Sidi, I'll let you out when I get back but until then you've got to be good. No barking."

Sidi whined, pressing a paw up against the door, scratching at it as if that would make it open. "It won't be long. They can take care of this in no time. I'll let you out when I get back. I promise."

He rose and put his shirt back on, followed by the sweatshirt. He got as far as the door to his quarters, tripping the sensor when he stopped.

Wilson.

She was supposed to work Gamma shift tonight. She complained about that to Dr. Dhuinn. Jeremy cradled the towel wrapped arm to his chest and stared at the turbolift door opposite his quarters.

She wouldn't care what happened. She may not even ask what happened. But she would judge. She would write it up in his file. And he knew what she would write. Deliberate self mutilation. Further, she would declare he'd done it so she would have to give him drugs. She would make an issue of it. If not with Dr. Dhuinn then with Holliday or someone off the ship.

Jeremy would be locked away for an evaluation again. They'd use this as evidence that he was a danger to himself.

Or worse. She would blame it on Sidi and have him declared viscious and a danger. She'd do it out of spite and to get back at him for what he did. Jeremy shook his head. He apologized but, unlike Dr. Dhuinn, he knew it didn't matter. She would take the opportunity to hurt him to make up for her own revelation as a petulant, spoiled and insufferable child. They'd take Sidi away and...being labelled viscious or uncontrollably vicious...he'd be destroyed which was just a fancy euphemism for killed without benefit of a trial. Jeremy doubted that Holliday would interfere in that action.

Shaking his head he turned away from the door, more worried now that Wilson wouldn't care if Sidi had done it or not, she'd declare he had just to hurt Jeremy. He couldn't let that happen to Sidi. It wasn't Sidi's fault! HE was too slow! HE didn't get his arm out of the way in time! HE had to assert dominance!

Jeremy went back to the bathroom. He just couldn't go to Medical. He might have had a chance with Dr. Dhuinn of saving Sidi from small minded people who talked about species diversity but would destroy Sidi for acting in the manner in which he was trained, but there was no chance with Wilson.

The items he replicated were still on the counter, waiting for his use. He unwrapped the towel.

Now that it had a chance to breathe and settle, the wounds didn't look that bad. He flexed his hand. He still had use of it so it must not have affected nerves or muscle. The pink he thought was muscle was just flesh. Really, it wasn't more than a flesh wound. He'd had worse. He laid the towel on the counter and put his arm on it. He'll have to watch for infection, telling himself at the first sign of it, or the wounds worsening, he'd go to Medical, making sure Dr. Dhuinn was there. He hoped she'd at least give him a chance to explain.

"It's not Sidi's fault," he said to himself, harshly. "I started the game. I should have been faster. It's what he's trained to do."

He worked on bandaging the arm and wrapping it in gauze and then a wrap. Leaving the mess for a moment, he went back to the replicator. Flicking his wrist he looked for his personal files, finding the item he wanted. "Computer, access personal PADD of Jeremy Stone. Upload file "Stone Sleeve Natural" to replicator system. Then ident and lock to Jeremy Stone."

~Ackowledged.~

"Stone sleeve natural," Jeremy said to the replicator. A pair of flesh colored compression sleeves appeared on the tray. jeremy used them for a brief time before, wondering how they'd hide the scars on his arms, maybe allowing him to wear something a little more casual when he was off duty. He never took to the idea and stopped wearing them. This time, however, it was meant as a means of concealing the bandages underneath his sleeve. This way if his sleeve hitched up again, the bandage wouldn't be immediately noticeable.

He went back to the bathroom and cleared up the mess, putting everything into the reclamator. He opened the kennel on his way out of the bathroom. Sidi remained inside, watching him, panting.

Jeremy crawled into bed, only slightly tired. His routine was thoroughly screwed up the last few nights but he had to expect that. There was much going on. But things would settle here again and soon.

He lie in bed, on his side, the lights dimmed but not turned out. "I'm sorry," he said, watching Sidi, still lying in the kennel. "I know you were just doing what you're trained to do. It'll be okay. I barely notice anything's wrong anyway."

Sidi laid his head forward, atop his outstretched paws, watching Jeremy with his brown eyes. He yawned, his pink tongue curling before he settled his head back onto his paws. "Don't worry, Sidi, it'll be alright. We'll both be much more careful in the future."

[OFF]

LTjg Jeremy Stone
Chief Security/Tactical Officer/K9
USS Galileo

Sidious MWD 7223
Security K9 unit
USS Galileo

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