A Bald Investigation

Posted on 25 Sep 2015 @ 1:07pm by Jynn & Commander Norvi Stace

3,327 words; about a 17 minute read

Mission: Episode 09 - Empires
Location: Executive Officer's Office, Deck Two, USS Galileo
Timeline: MD04; 1900 Hours

ON:

Having notified the ship's counselling department on the way to her office about what may or may not be about to erupt on the ship, Stace then took herself silently to her office to research precedents on Deltan oath breakers. To her surprise there was actually very little documented on the subject since very few Deltan's broke their oaths - or got caught doing so. The few who had been caught and processed were classified beyond her security clearance and for a moment she considered seeing if her old Level 10 command code would work, before she resigned herself to thinking that it would be foolish to try and also, almost a decade after her predecessor's death, futile.

She read and re-read through the case files again before deciding that they actually didn't help her cause and after twenty minutes of preparing her own file, called Lieutenant Jynn to make his way to her office.

Everything within Jynn felt like it was shifting, from his physical innards to his thoughts. At a moment he had felt as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders when he confessed to the captain, but now he felt as though the weight had just moved to his legs. He was deliberately slow, making his way to the office at perhaps a half steady walking pace, a snail's speed compared to his normally peppy stride.

And now here he was at another door. They were supposed to symbolize opportunities, but each door Jynn came across recently had felt so final, as though they all lead to one inevitable destination. It opened.

He walked into the room and paused steps away from the commander's desk. How different there second meeting would be from the first. With a look of defeat in his eyes he spoke, “Reporting as ordered, sir.”

"Please take a seat," she replied evenly, shifting in her chair a little as her eyes fell evenly upon him. It was difficult not to judge too harshly. Here stood someone with an opportunity envied by many: to be out in the stars at the forefront of Science and Federation technology and yet he had seemed to have cast it all away for the sake of personal relationships. For "love"? It wasn't so much that this man had sworn to his honour and yet abandoned his scruples, or that he had disrespected and ignored a sanction put in place to protect others, but it was that he acted in a selfish, unthinking avenue that disregarded those about him, those in contact with him. And above all else, Stace despised it.

She interlaced her fingers on the desk before her as a calm, professional expression befell her features and she flicked her brows up quizzically. "You know why you have been summoned here, Lieutenant. You have confessed to breaking your Starfleet oath of celibacy to Captain Holliday and I have been tasked to determine what exactly has transpired. Let's start at the beginning, shall we?"

Jynn let out a quiet sigh. Start from the beginning? Where would he start? Was it even necessary? “It was rather straightforward I suppose. I was caught up in the excitement of meeting all the new people when one of the people met me when this one person found me in the heights of excitement and emotion. The ball was set in a downhill motion and I couldn't stop it. We went to her quarters and things just sort of escalated from there.” It wasn't looking good. It certainly didn't feel it. Less than a day aboard and he had thrown it all away? What sort of stupid, idiotic decision was that? He just wanted to yell at himself as he spoke. He had jeopardized his entire future for one new and forbidden experience. One that he loved, but one he was paying the ultimate price for. “I'm not sure there's much to say beyond that, sir,” he finished in a muted voice.

"Lieutenant," Stace countered with a more forceful expression of dissatisfaction, "there's plenty more to say beyond that." She paused and then turned back to her console to mark down what he'd just said. "Where were you when you first met this other crewman, who was it, and when? We'll have to start with the basics, I'm afraid." She paused and then looked to him. She laced her fingers once again and then sighed. "This is going to be rather an uncomfortable and, I'm afraid, lengthy conversation between you and I. I'd like to be thorough so that nothing's left to be asked about second time around. Please keep your answers direct and concise. At this stage I'm not interested in feelings or intentions. Just the facts."

No feelings or intentions. Just facts. How could that even begin to paint the picture? But this was an investigation, not some tell-all tale. There was no emotion needed or desired. Shut it off, Jynn. Be a report, not an exposé. And so he did, ignoring his emotions once more. It was the least he could do for someone who no doubt had a lot of work ahead of her because of his carelessness.

“I at first met lieutenant Cyi in the ship's mess hall.” He was calm and collected as he spoke, most unlike the typical Jynn. “Our conversation led to me finding myself in a very excited and emotional state. I was looking for a partner to help me in my intent to distract myself from my emotions and after lieutenant Cyi departed lieutenant Voutilainen introduced herself to me. I asked if she would like to play a game with me and though she did not at first oblige she ended up impressing me with her skills with a knife after we had talked about emotional troubles and the need for distraction.

“This only heightened my emotions further. I told her I loved her, which put her in a bit of a state. She invited me to her quarters where she showed me her cherished collection of implements as well as a gift from her family. She then mentioned her tattoos, which reminded her of home, which I spared no time in reading over. After that I offered to show her mine and everything escalated rather quickly from there. I assume you do not need any more description beyond that,” he finished in a questioning tone, willing to add more if needed but figuring the report was more about why and not how. “What more do you need to know, sir?”

Stace then looked over from her console and pursed her lips. This was surely a mess and Stace felt more uncomfortable than ever having to pursue this line of inquiry. She turned back to her console and tapped a few further times before then turning her full attention back to Jynn. "Have you had any further contact with Lieutenant Voutilainen - either physical or otherwise - since this encounter? And does she remain your only transgression?" Her tone now seemed clipped. She was so unsure whether the Deltan was even slightly remorseful for his actions that an uncontrollable well of anger pitted itself in her belly. But, professionally, she pushed it aside and clenched her jaw.

"I have seen Lieutenant Voutilainen once more since our first encounter. It ended the same way as our first. And yes," Jynn began with a hint of assurance, "she has been my only transgression." He remained completely calm and emotionless, but on close inspection something seemed off, like every second of it there was an inner loathing of how he was speaking. Like at any moment something was going to explode. But the sterility of his report continued. "I can assure you there have been no others."

"That will hopefully be of some comfort to the lieutenant," Stace added with an exhale. She again tapped into the console and then righted herself to look upon him again. "Are you aware of Lieutenant Voutilainen having breached your trust to anyone else, or, as far as you're away, is it just the four of us who know of this?"

"No, sir. Lieutenant Voutilainen has made aware the senior medical staff, though I am not sure how many of them know. I have also confided in Lieutenant Idris, who was the one who insisted that I let the captain know of the situation. He made the right call, sir." Something happened behind Jynn's eyes as he spoke those last words, like even in his state of calm there was a voice questioning what he said. Something was being restrained within that head of his.

"It's just a pity that you didn't before this all happened, Lieutenant," Stace couldn't help but say. "It might have saved a lot of fall-out for Tuula. We have no idea how she is going to react to this transgression and that is why the oath is in place. But I am not here to judge or reprimand you. That is both above my authority and beyond my inclination." She paused and then noted down to talk with the medical staff and Lieutenant Idris before looking to the bald Deltan fully. "I think I have enough to go on with," she said, relaxing her face into a softer expression. "I will need you to detail in a written report exactly what transpired between you and Lieutenant Voutilainen. I don't want you to have to voice it, but without being indelicate, I need to be aware of what took place in the confines of your quarters."

“Yes, sir. I will get the report to you as soon as I am able. Is there anything else you need of me or does this conclude your,” Jynn paused as he thought for a moment for the right word. 'Interview' made sense. 'Interrogation' certainly fit, at least from where he was sitting. Not able to find any more of a fitting word he decided to go with the most sterile. “Report?” He was eager beyond measure to tear down his silly facade of modesty. He felt foolish for removing the emotion from the report but it was what was requested. Now all he needed was a simple 'OK' and he could add his own words, attempting to sway the commander in his favor, if that was even possible.

"For now," Stace replied evenly. "I'll no doubt have to speak to the medical crew who are aware of this and also to Lieutenant Idris. From there I will converse with the captain and then plot our path from that standpoint. You're dismissed to your quarters, Lieutenant, under the same restrictions Captain Holliday has already placed upon you. Is there anything I can get for you?"

Was there? Probably not. But perhaps she could give him one thing. A chance to add something, anything of emotion to her report, even if it was off the record. If she had a modicum of decency she wouldn't just listen to the report. She would listen to him.

"Permission to speak freely?"

She wondered whether it would do any good for him to speak so freely, and she wondered if she wanted him to. But she was not a cold and heartless woman, nor an unforgiving commander. She had most likely loved herself beyond his comprehension and didn't want to deny anyone that right but these rules were set in place to protect those who were vulnerable to that kind of emotion. She turned to her console and powered it down, locking eyes with him and then pulling her ears back in a warm and hopefully disarming manner, nodding silently to allow him to talk.

Where could Jynn begin? Would it even make a difference. He just had to try. Enough of the sterility. It was time he be himself again. He slowly opened the bottomless bottle of emotion, allowing it to seep out to the surface as his eyes shifted from an expression of cold acknowledgement to one of utter defeat.

"I can't be sent back. I can't go home. You don't understand..." He ended his last words in drawn out silence. Was there anything he could even say that would help his case. One thought came to mind. One that had been eating away at him for days and the farther along he went, the harder the feeling had become to bear. He was told he should feel it, but to do so was almost worse than any sin he had already committed.

With the defeat setting in further Jynn set his head between his hands, cradling it gently as he closed his eyes. He could bear to speak his words directly to anyone, most importantly himself, the reflection of his face in the table staring back at him as if to implore him to not speak what he was about to say. Like he was about to deny his very reason for existing.

"I regret what I have done," he spoke in a barely audible tone, gritting his teeth at the end as he attempted to restrain his emotions as they slowly came to a boil. How can you regret something so wonderful?! Because it's ending my life! There was so much enjoyment! But now there's so much pain! Jynn's only comfort was that the Trill would not feel the hurricane of emotions he was now feeling. "I regret all of it!" The statement was even true of the very words he spoke.

Stace listened in silence, and for the first time considered that he may actually be remorseful, but then she thought to the opening gambit of his emotional outburst and shut down her sympathy within a heartbeat. "You seem to be preoccupied with what may become of you because of your actions, Lieutenant: Not being sent home; the repercussions of this to you..." Stace paused to allow her meaning to settle on his conscious. "But what of poor Tuula? A woman incapable of understanding her emotions after your advances. Non-Deltans are susceptible to your pheromones and you are fully aware of this. So aware that you swear an oath upon entering into Starfleet to withhold from any such activity. Not to punish you or your race," she then added, furrowing her brow as she shook her head in disbelief, "but to protect those whom you serve with; who serve beneath you in rank and position, and those trapped on such a small vessel, like the Galileo, with no where to flee when their simple, affected affections are toyed with like this. You have abandoned all reason and care for anyone other than yourself in this and now your primary concern is you own preservation."

“Affections toyed with? My advances?” The accusation hit Jynn with more force than was maybe intended, but it struck a chord. “Like I planned this? That I wanted it this way? Like I willingly and knowingly chose Tuula ahead of time, for what, some thrilling ride that I knew could destroy her?” The commander's other accusation, the one of undeniable selfishness, was lost on Jynn for the moment, or subconsciously ignored. He was hurt. He was insulted. He was angry and it was beginning to show. “My pheromones where in check, as always, and what happened was completely on the spur of the moment. We were just in her quarters and,” he interrupted himself as his face almost went white. “What are you trying to say, sir? That I'm some-” He fell silent, his heart skipping a beat and dropping down to the pit of his stomach and despair alike. He had never felt so low.

"I am not trying to say anything," Stace countered back, her jaw clenched as she swallowed hard to check her anger. "But you will watch your tone when addressing me. Is that clear, Lieutenant?" Before he could intimate his reply, she continued. "Deltans are prohibited, so categorically so as to swear an oath upon entering into Starfleet, not to enter into 'personal' relationships with other non-Deltans. Having taken that oath yourself, apprise me of its reason for existence."

Jynn let out a defeated sigh. Clearly his intentions of clearing up the situation with a bit of actual emotion had escalated into something that was only detrimental to his cause. He certainly had plenty of thinking to do. On his oath. On his future. On Tuula. There was almost too much for one brain. Having nothing left he could say that could possibly make his situation any better he had but one question left to ask. "Permission to be excused, sir," he asked in a straightforward tone as to indicate he was obviously done with any further questioning.

"Permission denied," she said flatly. "I want you to answer the question."

First looking to the side as if to mentally say something to someone other than the two of them in the room, Jynn then turned his gaze to the commander. His sigh was mental and his frustration was subdued over the course of a few thoughtful seconds. He was sure to watch his tone closely before he began. “My people's oath of celibacy was enacted in order to make sure that we do not take advantage of any non-Deltan personnel, or anyone else at all for that matter.” His voice slowly turned sorrowful as he continued, as though the original pact itself was laid out before him and he was studying its every word. “It is there to protect both ourselves and the others aboard the vessels we serve on. So that accusations of pheromone usage and mental manipulation and all that is implied are not levied upon us, even if we feel it was a simple act of love. So crewmen's minds and careers are not put at risk, even if they themselves feel the situation was right, a simple act of love.” That's what it was to him, really. Love. But as he spoke he knew that even if it was that there were dire consequences for expressing it. It felt like oppression but it was protection. He steeled himself once more, barely holding his emotions back by concentration alone rather than inherent ability. “So this doesn't happen,” he spoke with a trembling voice through lacrimal-rinsed eyes. There was nothing left to say. He just stared back at the commander in silence as he awaited his dismissal.

Her features softened but her will did not. Stace took in a breath and with a slow and measured exhale moved her head to the side to regard him in a lighter fashion. With a somewhat pitying expression, she pursed her lips and nodded. "Then you're dismissed, Lieutenant." She wanted to say that she would assist him with his case. That she would, with some deep-rooted maternal instinct that roused itself from a previous host's buried memories, protect him as his superior officer. But she couldn't. For she knew that a procedure was now set in place on the rail roads to a court martial that even the Admiral would struggle to shunt off. In the macrocosm of space and the Fleet, everything seemed magnified and worsened. Her primary goal had to now be to protect Tuula and the fall-out from this. "Return to your quarters and I'll advise you of where we stand once I've finished."

A nod and a “Yes, sir.” It was all Jynn could muster in reply before he turned on a heal and faced the door. There was a few seconds of silence as he allowed the gravity of the encounter sink in. He could feel the commander's eyes upon him as he stood there. Then, when the encounter had truly sunk in, he exited the room slowly. Everything seemed to be sinking.

OFF:

Commander Norvi Stace
Executive Officer
USS Galileo

Lieutenant JG Jynn
Chief Flight Control Officer
USS Galileo

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