Laying Low

Posted on 16 Oct 2021 @ 9:37am by Commander Scarlet Blake & Commander Luke Wyatt & Lily Blake
Edited on on 29 Oct 2021 @ 6:49pm

5,501 words; about a 28 minute read

Mission: Episode 17 - Crystal of Life
Location: USS Galileo-A - Outside Wyatt's Quarters
Timeline: MD 06, 1900 hrs

[ON]

Lily Blake looked up to her mother as they walked down the corridor, holding onto her hand comfortably as she smiled up with warmth. She wore a simple red dress, her dark hair tied back out of the way in two plaits that swayed one over each shoulder as they walked. "He likes cake? He must like cake. Everyone likes cake...."

Scarlet chuckled gently at that, nodding lightly as they neared Luke's quarters. What it was to be a child...when life was as simple as 'everyone must like cake...therefore, cake makes everything better'. "Let's find out," she squeezed the young girl's hand before pressing the chime on the door.

In truth, she was a little concerned about Luke. She knew how out of control it must have all felt during the mission. She'd not seen any of it first hand, having been on the away mission, but she could picture it well enough, especially with how many different versions she'd heard from different people. She'd calmed down from her initial outrage of just how unruly it had all gotten. Truth was, she hadn't seen Luke out and about since her return, and that worried her.

Luke had been locked away for several days now, truthfully he had lost count and the care to count early on and whilst Nesh's and his reconciliation was a welcomed memory it was not enough to budge him from his self isolation. When his door chime rang again he was unsure to answer it. "Come in" Whoever it was on the other side would see Luke's unshaven beard, hair unkempt and wearing grey jogging shirts and tank top. Around his room laid half read books discarded on all different surfaces. The room wasn't dirty it was messy.

Scarlet moved in with Lily by her side. Already, her eyes were taking in the room and the man at a thousand miles an hour. She was glad they had come, it wasn't like him at all. She opened her mouth to speak, but her daughter beat her to it.

"We made you fluffy cloud cake!" Lily grinned as she lifted the see through carrier with the cake sealed safely inside. It was a large cake with pink and white swirls of icing piled on top, and a sprinkle of edible glitter.

"It...was Lily's choice," Scarlet followed up swiftly with a small, half smile of amusement. She'd tried to steer her towards something more...simple, but the girl had insisted that Luke would like that one best.

Like a deer in head lights he could only feel side blinded by the two people who would crash down his self built prison and Luke broke a smile towards Lily. "Thank you it looks absolutely delicious, why don't you go put it on the table and get us some forks and put your cake to good use. "

"I can do that!" Lily declared, pleased, as always, to be able to do something she was tasked with. She hurried off, carefully sliding the cake onto the table before hurrying to the kitchen, the promise of eating it speeding her feet.

Watching the young spitting image of Scarlet leave he now looked to Scarlet, and spoke softly and harshly, more than he had originally intended. "Bringing the girl here is unfair." He said picking up the three stray books that were within arms reach and went to move to place them in his bookcase which too was no longer in its uniform layout.

Scarlet arched an eyebrow with mild surprise at the way he spoke, but remained unphased as she picked a couple more books up and followed him to set them back in place. " 'The girl' has a name, and she happens to adore you. I didn't have much of a choice..." she replied lightly.

Lukes hand remained still, holding onto a book half back in its position in the bookcase, "There's always a choice," he said glumly before pushing the book fully in with a little force so that the books either side jumped. Turning to see Lily across from him, "and maybe her admiration is misplaced in me, you knew better, and always kept a distance." Really not feeling the conversation he leaned his head back against the bookcase the headache he had from this morning returning.

"That's not fair, you're assuming that's about you," Scarlet whispered firmly, watching him with dark blue eyes for a long moment. She sighed, shaking her head as she motioned to him. "Besides, she's not the only one who looks up to you here."

"Then what," he said rubbing his forehead as an unfamiliar and distasteful swell of anger boiled inside Luke. Doing everything he could he pushed back the anger as the buzzing in his ears had reached fever pitch he hadn't even registered the last part of her words still dwelling on her first words he added quickly "I'm basically a glorified babysitter, In fact, lets not go there I don't have the strength or patience."

Luke's heart was pounding as was his head and he wasn't sure what it was from as if the coup was bad enough he was now reminded of all his failures with Scarlet. He needed a drink. Moving over to the Replicator he watched Lily carefully and filled with sadness before ordering a whiskey neat no ice in a low gruff voice.

Finished with her mission, Lily moved for Luke, smiling warmly up to him as she reached for his hand to tug him towards the golden goal of cake. She suddenly giggled though when she looked up to his face, looking at the unfamiliar stubble on his face. "Ooo!" she pointed to his chin with a grin. "Like a cute little hedgehog!"

Looking down at Lily and then to the drink in his hand his heart sank, "Like a hedgehog," he repeated trying a smile. He looked again at the drink in his hand and placed it onto the side leaving it there, he didn't want Lily to see him like this and what was he thinking, drinking in front of her. He knew better. "Let's try this cake then shall we," he said letting her tug him across the room before sitting at the table she had set up the cake.

She waited for him to sit down so she could scramble up onto his lap, leaning to pull the cake closer. "It should taste like strawberries and cream and marshmallow," she listed it off with great anticipation, but let her mother offer the knife to Luke. She leant to whisper to him, her hand cupped around her mouth in a dramatic stage whisper. "That's what fluffy clouds taste of...."

With his left arm in a half hug supporting Lily he could only think about how the innocence of a child was always a weakness for him, that's how Abbey got away with so much. "Well... In that case..." he said accepting the knife and cutting three slices and placing each one on a plate that Lily had set up for them. "Ladies first," he said sliding a plate to Scarlet his sad and apologetic eyes searching hers.

Scarlet watched him for a long moment before giving a small smile, moving to sit with him. "Ladies? Been a while since I've been called that," she said lightly, trying some. It was a sweet concoction, and she couldn't deny that she liked it, but clearly Lily was in sugar heaven as she tucked in with a contented sigh. "You can count down to the sugar rush..."

A wriggly Lily on his leg, "I think we may have already reached peak sugar consumption," he joked eating his first bit of cake and Lily's description fit perfectly, if clouds tasted of anything it was this sugary concoction.

~~~

The sugarfallout had been as dramatic as the sugar rush. The young girl had been a flurry around them, tugging on Luke's hand now and then to try and get him to play too. But, as with all the best sugar rushes, the energy had faded, leaving the girl slumped and heavy in between the adults. After tucking her up to snooze on the sofa, Scarlet had carried two coffees through to the bedroom to sit with Luke, offering one over with an appraising look. "So are you going to tell me what it is now?"

Having moved to the bedroom Luke took the coffee mug from her and held it to his mouth as he sipped it slowly before lowering himself to the edge of the bed, like most of the rooms in his quarters it was unmade and messy. Letting out a soft sigh as the caffeine flooded his system and the warmth spread like the sun under his skin Luke considered her question before saying, "What do you mean?"

"What's wrong," she replied bluntly, sipping her drink before leaning forward to him, meeting his eyes so she could see what was going on in them. "This isn't you..."

Holding her gaze for a moment Luke could see the whole galaxy in her eyes but then he remembered how he let everyone down and turned his head away, for the first time in his life he couldn't bare to look at Scarlet. "Its... Something I want to work on alone" his voice was cracked and tinged with sadness.

Scarlet was silent for a long moment, looking him over as she considered the best approach. But she already knew the only way she could approach it, so she braced herself. "Well that method isn't working very well for you," she replied frankly, but her tone remained as level and soft as usual. "So perhaps it's best to try a different one."

"And how do you know it's not working and besides what methods are there, I don't want to talk to a shrink I'm not stupid I know I'm not acting myself but maybe this is the new me, the old me was... Imperfect anyway," he said, the coffee he had finished so placing the mug on the side before rolling his spine down he laid back onto the bed and proceeded to stare up at the room's ceiling. The only escape from having to look at Scarlet and be reminded of yet another failing in his life.

"Both you and your place look a mess," she replied firmly. She would never coddle him, never. She had too much respect for him and where he came from to do that. She turned on the bed, pulling a leg up onto it to tuck under her, twisting so she could look down over him, shaking her head. "That's not the sign of a method that's working. Not someone like you. I'm going to bet you've not been out either?" she tilted her head as she looked down at him with a frown of concern. "You don't have to talk to a counsellor, but you could talk to me."

Pushing himself up onto his elbows he shook his head. "Of course I haven't been outside how could I even face anyone right now Scarlet. I let everyone down, abandoned you, and destroyed years of trust between me and Lirha. I'm a mess because I went against everything I believe in, good soldiers follow orders and I didn't, everyone keeps saying it's ok but it's not what happens next time?"

"You're more than just a soldier now," she replied quietly, taking the chance to meet his eyes now he was looking at her again. "You were in a command position on the bridge, your duty was to this ship and this crew. And so help me, but if you'd have put this crew and ship in danger to come and find me and my team in the middle of a hostile mission, I'd have had your guts for garters," she arched an eyebrow, nothing but honesty in her eyes on that point. "When you're sitting next to the Captain, you don't get to just follow orders like a good soldier anymore, it's not that easy. You have to do the best you can with the choices you've got on the table...and sometimes, they're all bad choices, but you still have to make one. Because there is nothing more dangerous than a commander who makes no decision, and lets everything drift out of control."

"Maybe I'm tired of all that Scarlet, maybe I don't want to be making the decisions, what have I achieved in the last few years? I've been injured, I've lost my daughter and I've lost friends even a whole ship. And we came so close to doing it again, for what? For Starfleet? It would have been better if Abbey had survived at least she'd have her life to look forward to, I have nothing." Luke blinked several times as he attempted to hold back his tears.

She watched him with pain at seeing his tears, even if years of experience in her various roles kept her features more neutral than she felt. She reached out, squeezing his hand firmly as she searched his eyes. "You have a proud career, both behind and ahead of you," she said firmly. "You have friends who love you. I am so sorry about Abbey, I truly am. You were given a second chance with a different daughter, and I know it's not the same, but it's still more than many get. You can have whatever you want, Luke...a wife, if that's what you want, more family, there's nothing stopping that, you have time."

Luke felt her hand on his and with his spare hand wiped away the tears. "I wish what you were saying was true and I do consider myself lucky to have a second chance with a second daughter but I can't have everything I want, you know that." Luke looked to her now, holding her eyes before adding, "Especially in the way you say it so," Luke didn't want this to turn into a 'them' drama but the more the conversation went along the more he felt the pain of being near Scarlet again. Luke had already started having doubts with Marissa since before they left but wanted to give it another go, he was going to break things off with her but hadn't found the courage yet.

"You can and will find someone who is everything you need and want them to be," she said quietly, shaking her head gently as she squeezed his hand reassuringly. "You won't always feel like this. How you're feeling now won't last forever. You just have to give yourself a break...and a chance."

"I have, but like we both know they haven't," Luke sighed and stood up and moved away from the bed. "I don't think this is something I want to talk about anymore, I appreciate you coming Scarlet I really do and of course I love Lily like she is my own when I said I have one daughter I think really I have two but I don't know if you should stay." His final words were sad much like the rest of his speech had been.

She looked at her hand that had dropped onto the bed when he'd moved away, sighing softly as she put it neatly in her lap instead, turning to sit properly on the edge of the bed, back straight and shoulders back. "Why?" she asked quietly.

"Because being with you is like being a moth to a flame, I can not resist you and I'll only get burned," Luke replied simply, "I can't have the things I want because I can't have you, I tell myself to get over it and for a while I do but then I see you again, I see your smile I hear your laugh and it kills me, and the thing is its not even your fault it's someone else's and I'm powerless to change that." He turned away again facing the picture frame up on the wall of him with other members of the crew, all smiling faces looking back at him, how much happier he was back then. "And I don't want to have this conversation with you."

Scarlet remained silent for several long moments as she looked to the wall, her chest tight and throat following suit. She just stared, skin pale and lips slightly parted. "Maybe you needed to say it," she finally replied. If he needed to drain the poison, she could deal with that. "I've never wanted to hurt you," she added on a tight voice. "You're one of my closest friends, I've never wanted that. And I do truly believe you'll find someone better, someone you deserve." She took a strained breath, pulling her shoulders back a little, licking her lips. "But you won't find happiness locked away in here."

"But maybe I'll find peace. If I can't have happiness then peace will have to do," Luke looked to the time, growing more distant and unwilling to talk about his feelings especially for her. She'd never understand that his true happiness would be her, but not just her as a person. Lily too, and all the baggage Scarlet and he carried they'd carry together and once again Luke found anger at the thought of something that wouldn't happen and how his self isolation due to disobeying orders and abandoning Lirha eventually made its way back to Scarlet, like most things did which only annoyed him more. "We shouldn't wake Lily, I'll find my cot bed and sleep in the main room feel free to have the bed if you're staying that is."

"No, this is your place," she said with a frown, swallowing past the tightness in her throat. "If you don't want me to stay, then I'll go...but we don't have to talk, I just don't want you to be alone right now..." she moved to his side, taking a hold of his arm, trying to meet his eyes. "Because despite what you think, you haven't lost anyone here. You were looking out for your crew and your ship...you were the First Officer, it's what we do."

"I know." His cold demeanour breaking as he looked down to her hand on his arm the warmth spreading and then back to where her blue eyes searched his. Face to face Luke said in a whisper, “I don't want you to go anywhere." With his other free hand he cupped her cheek and in that moment thought about kissing her, how her lips would have felt on his but he didn't need to think he knew, he had done it once before and with that memory he hesitated.

Scarlet covered the hand with her own, searching his eyes, seeing the emotion in them, she would have to be blind not to. She leant close, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. "Then I will stay, and I won't lecture you anymore," she promised.

"Thank you," Luke said speaking softly as he moved to the bed, he remained clothed which wasn't something he'd usually do and after pulling back the covers he positioned himself to stay on one side of the bed allowing more than enough space for a sensible gap if she chose too. The couch was already taken by a small Lily and after declaring she wasn't going to leave it didn't leave too many options, Luke's earlier talk of a cot bed was more of a 'on the floor' type scenario. "I hope you don't snore," he said finally at an attempt of his old humour.

Scarlet shook her head with a chuckle at that, her shoulders loosening a little at the quip. She slipped her boots off before getting in next to him, only taking her jacket off before she did. "Depends how much brandy I've had," she glanced to him with a small smile at that, untying her hair to be more comfortable before lying down, pulling the cover up to try and get settled.

Having watched her ready herself for bed, Luke wondered what world he had found himself in, his thought was cut short when the portion of bed next to him moved as she settled in and quickly he realised that his bed was much smaller than he thought. "I think I've had alcohol for a little while," Luke said as he lay face up at the ceiling, before adding "Computer dim lights." The room's lighting dropped to an almost pitch darkness and all that could be heard was their slow and steady breathing. Luke had wondered for years what it would be like to be in the same bed as Scarlet, feeling like an awkward teenager was not it but then, who was he to complain he was lucky she stuck around at all and they both had their histories to deal with.

Scarlet settled into a comfortable sleep, needing the rest, more tired than she had realised. Her body rested in a deep slumber until a few hours later, when it started to shift and move on the bed. Her steady breathing became quicker and harsher, her breath caught high in her chest and throat, as if it was a struggle. Her already fair skin turned a paler shade, but it shimmered with the sweat that was rapidly forming on it. The more she tried to move, the more the cover coiled around her legs and trapped her, and the more trapped she became, the more she pulled to break free.

It never took much for Luke to wake anymore, he was a light sleeper so when Scarlet began thrashing around he had woken almost immediately. Unsure whether to wake her Luke looked nervously down at Scarlet before deciding to try and calm her down. "Scarlet, you're ok. You're safe, you're aboard the Galileo." He tried to untangle the covers with little to no success her legs moving quicker than he could. "Scarlet," he said softly, unsure if it was a tear or sweat he was wiping from her cheek, her body slick with glistening beads of sweat.

She grabbed his wrist tightly as her eyes flickered open, and it was impossible to tell if she was pushing the hand away or pulling it closer. She looked around with confusion, and it was clear that wherever she was, it wasn't on the Galileo. For a woman like Scarlet who had practiced the art of keeping her features cool and calm no matter what was in front of her, it was rare to see raw emotion on her features and in her eyes, but they shone with it now...a mixture of fear, exhaustion and confusion bound together by a thread of repulsion. "I can't breathe," she whispered, unthinking, not even realising the words had escaped, but her chest was moving rapidly with the effort of someone who truly felt it.

Luke was now in pain himself as her hand squeezed his wrist, but also from watching her be seemingly so distraught her chest rising and falling her breathing shallow and rapid. "Scarlet," he said softly again in an attempt not to cause any further negative effects, his voice only slightly distorted from the pain she was causing him and sleep. "Look around you're safe you're fine, you're on the Galileo so just." He breathed in and breathed out in the demonstration "I won't let anything happen to you." He added looking down at Scarlet his face not far from hers as her shallow breaths brushed the loose hairs from the fringe of his face, with one wrist out of action he was straining not to fall.

She searched his eyes with confusion before struggling to prop herself up onto her elbows, breathing hard through the wash of overwhelming emotion and memory. "Galileo," she whispered, but there was a note of uncertainty in her strained voice as she pulled the back of her hand across her face.

Relived Luke nodded, "Galileo," he reassured before then going onto say "Nightmare? I've never seen anyone... not since the war," he said sadly searching her eyes, Scarlet was always so strong and to see her broken down and gasping for air frightened him.

"Nightmare," she repeated vaguely as she pushed her dark hair out of her face, her chest still moving with the recovering breath. Nightmare. Memory. It all merged now. She pushed the covers off, shivering with the air on the drying sweat on her skin, but she couldn't stand being caught up. "I...could do with some of that whisky now," she said quietly, tilting her head towards him.

"Really?" he asked with worry lacing his voice as he looked to her, his thought of her beauty battled the thoughts of his worry. For years he had loved Scarlet from a distance never being allowed close enough and even now next to each other he felt further away than before, even when in a relationship he was never fully committed. "I'll grab a bottle and some glasses," he finally said knowing that she wouldn't have said anything if she didn't mean it. He returned moments later with a bottle and two glasses already filled passing her one as he sat back in bed.

Scarlet was leant back against the head of the bed as she took the glass, legs pulling up close against herself as she sipped it. Her eyes closed with the warmth it offered and she let out a slower, shaking but more steady breath. "I'm sorry," she finally offered, shaking her head slightly as she looked into the glass in the dim light.

Luke's glass hadn't left his lap in the time she had her first sip and apologised, "For what?" he asked this time the glass rim finding his lips and he drank the whiskey, it sending a shiver down his back and soon replaced by that warm feeling it often left.

"This," she motioned to herself with a frown, shaking her head. "I came here to help, not wake you in the middle of the night." A great use that had been, she took another sip, letting it steady her.

"You did help, Lily helped." He dropped his glass down to his lap, "I haven't slept in days and tonight with you by my side and that little ray of sunshine next door helped me to remember who I was. You did help, so let me help you too." He placed a hand on her arm.

She let out a soft breath, relieved at the words as she nodded gently, resting more easily back against the head of the bed, tension still coiled tight in her body, but not her face. "You pour a good drink," she whispered, trying a half smile.

He let out a low deep chuckle, "I've had plenty of practice lately, so are we going to talk or just get drunk?" Luke leaned to get the bottle refilling his empty glass and offering it to her. "Or both?" He shrugged.

Scarlet looked inside of her glass, tilting it to watch the ripple in the dark liquid as she let out a long, tired breath. "Do you ever wonder what it would be like if you'd stayed in the marines until the end?" she asked softly, glancing his way.

He sat back and did the same, drinking the liquid and filling his glass again offering to do the same with hers. "I think the end would have already come and gone if I stayed in the Marines but looking back I can't decide if that would have been a good thing or not, maybe Abbey wouldn't have died, maybe I wouldn't have had to betray one of my closest friends," Luke paused thinking again, this time taking a smaller sip. "I wouldn't have met you or Lily."

She watched him in the dim light, nodding slowly with understanding. "That life did nothing but batter us," she said quietly, shaking her head unconsciously, drawing her legs up to rest her arms on her knees. "Why were we so enraptured with it?"

"I was a very different person back then, it was a very different time back then when the enemy was right in front of us. We knew what we were fighting for and what defeat meant," Luke put his free left hand over hers, as she seemingly curled up. "Enraptured isn't what I would call it, some of us just got luckier than others. Why all this talk of the Marines Scarlet?" He looked to her, into her eyes trying to read what she was thinking, feeling even.

"It's what I dream of mostly. That or growing up, like most people I guess," she turned her head towards him, shaking it slowly as she swallowed hard. "Serving in the Marines seems like a lifetime ago sometimes, like...a story in a holodeck that happened to someone else. But when I dream...I'm back there. Like it was just yesterday. Now it's all come to an end...you can't help but think about what we built."

Luke considered her word for a moment, and oddly, unlike himself said “We didn't build anything, not together anyways." Feeling bad as soon as he said the words he quickly added, "What happened to you, to throw you so far back into the past?"

She was just silent for a long moment, her fingers stroking a stray drop of amber liquid on the glass that she gripped with white fingers. "Mission went wrong," she shook her head, sighing tiredly. "Our fault..." she shook her head with a frown. Our. His. Who could tell anymore. "I ended up captured, and I was in a cell for what felt like a very long time."

Luke noticed the grip she had on the glass, her fingers white from lack of blood flowing to their tips. He gently placed his hand in hers to take the glass from her either to put it to one side or to refill it would be her decision. “When the sutherland encountered the borg and we were being boarded the ship all but destroyed I thought that day I was going to die, since then I've been granted years aboard the Galileo, sometimes things are just meant to stay in the past and somethings are meant to be spoken about and shared with others so that they can help ease their burden." It would be up to Scarlet if she wanted to share the story.

Scarlet watched their hands for a long moment, holding her breath tightly, swallowing hard past the tightness of her throat. "I remember it," she assured with a small smile to him. "I was...still the Chief Counsellor then. And first time I met you properly...I think I scolded you like you were 5, for playing games with Lily out in the corridor..."

The memory surfaced in Luke's mind like it was yesterday, "I bumped into her when she was hunting for Dragons and helped her find Lieutenant Patch." Luke watched her facial expressions and her eyes. "And as for you, you should know better Those were the first words you ever said to me followed quickly by No offence, Wyatt, but I have no idea whether you're safe or not, I hardly know you. Ever since then I made sure to get to know the fiery counsellor with the renegade daughter, years later I still am."

She chuckled softly, some of the hardness in her features relaxing a little with it. "I said that? You're probably right...it sounds like something I'd say. Impressive, that you didn't steer clear of us after that. It's not usual counsellor fodder."

"The warning signs were there but... I've spent years trying to stay away and forget yet to no avail I'm either a fool or a hopeless romantic either way I wouldn't change anything, I just appreciate the fact I got to meet you and Lily. Remind me of some of the reasons I keep fighting," he sighed, "What are we doing here Scarlet?" He didn't have anything other than a questioning tone in his voice, he traced the back of her hand with his thumb engraving each small bump to memory incase this moment didn't last forever, which he knew it wouldn't.

"I think I came here to help you, and ended up causing more trouble instead," Scarlet said softly, shaking her head with a small, wry smile, setting both of their glasses aside. "Come on, let's try and get some sleep. You have a fresh leaf to turn over in the morning and I have a girl to take care of, and I'm not just talking about Lily..."

[OFF]

--

Lt Commander Luke Wyatt
Chief Security Officer
USS Galileo-A

Commander Scarlet Blake
First Officer
USS Galileo-A

Lily Blake
Civilian Child
USS Galileo-A
[PNPC Blake]

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