When Cardassians Cry

Posted on 04 Apr 2017 @ 11:55pm by Lieutenant JG Eelim Galan & Commander Marisa Wyatt
Edited on on 09 Apr 2017 @ 8:32am

2,038 words; about a 10 minute read

Mission: Episode 14 - Statecraft
Location: Sandoval's Office
Timeline: MD07 1100 hours

[ON]

Eelim stood in front of the counselor's temporary office. He was still debating when the door opened. He startled a bit, but then righted himself. "I...um... are you the counselor," he asked.

Marisa was on her way to do a bit of walkabout. It was a good way to hear what was going on around the ship. She stopped and smiled. "So they tell me," Marisa replied, a humorous twinkle in her eye. "Would you like to come in?" She stepped back so that he could enter the small room.

Eelim stayed at the door. He was quite nervous to be there. He'd never actively sought out a counselor. He rubbed the back of his neck. "I...umm...You looked like you were on your way out. I don't want to keep you. I mean...I...I don't have an appointment," he said quickly. "I should make one..."

"You're not keeping me. I was going for a walk, but I can always do that later," she said, smiling to put him at ease. "Please, come in and have a seat. No appointment is necessary."

She took a few steps into the room and turned. "I don't bite."

He looked a bit skeptical but he entered anyway. He looked around the space. "So...how does this go. I'm used to the Starfleet standard qualifications for duty I never really wanted to talk to a counselor on my own."

"Well, generally I like to talk and find out more about you. If we were back on a starship, there'd also be a written exam. But for now, we'll just talk."

Marisa sat down and smiled. "You can start by telling me something about yourself."

He sat down and sighed. "Where do I start?" It was a genuine question. "I guess I never fit in at home, left when I was young, joined Starfleet. I thought I was in love, but had my heart broken, found out the man I thought was my father wasn't really, fell in love again...” He shrugged. "I guess that's it in a nutshell."

"Well, that can be said for a lot of people," Marisa said. "Although that doesn't make it any easier when you're the one going through it. Why did you feel like you didn't fit in at home and has that improved any since leaving?"

Eelim sighed. "I wanted to be a poet and an artist ever since I could remember. My father...or the man I thought was my father, Gul Galan, was having none of it. He was...a monster. Never mind to his family but he was a part of the occupation. The only father figure I had was Derat but...well it turns out that he was actually my real father. So Galan's animosity to me was due to that. He was determined to make my mother and Derat suffer." He looked out the window blinded by the memories.

" One day I was 16 and coming home from school, when I saw Starfleet and Bajoran prisoners with my father's men. I remember being so...helpless and angry, and ashamed. I decided to stand up. I helped free them and we got off planet. Galan tried to take it out on my siblings, his full blood children. I remember going to the Cardassian prison colony and helping Kalar, the Romulan sub-commander I helped save that day when I left and who took me in for a few years. We freed my siblings left and that was that. I spent a few years running from my feelings on Romulus, training, then I went to Bajor and lived with Luma Teprin, a Starfleet officer I helped that day." He stopped his voice quite horse. He didn't realize it but the tears he'd held in for so many years were spilling forth freely now blazing a trail down his pale skin.

Marisa gently put her hand on his arm. "The Bajoran occupation was a terrible thing for many people. Few were brave enough to stand up to the atrocities. You have nothing you need to run from. On the contrary, you should be proud of what you did, of the people you helped."

He took a few steadying breaths. "I wish I could have done more. In the end it doesn't matter. The women I loved left me because I was Cardassian and the woman that I love now...well I ask myself daily what she would want with someone like me." He shook his head stood and walked over to the mirror staring at his image. "There are times that I wonder...."

"First, there are a lot of Cardassians who, like you, are victims of their circumstances. You are not responsible for what Cardassians did during the Occupation. And," she went on, her gaze direct, "if you find someone who loves you for who you are you should be grateful and make the most of your time together. You could drive her away by being too afraid to accept the gift you've been given."

"That is what I am afraid of." He came back to the sofa and sat down, "Derat, my real father, he was the opposite of Galan. He worked tirelessly to help Bajor. He was a man of honour. I wish I could be more like him. I'm tired of feeling helpless and afraid. I have so many ideas I just don't know where to start."

"Ideas about what?" she asked. She wanted to know more about his real father, but finding out about his ideas might lead her back to that subject. She could already tell that he was more like his biological father, but she wasn't sure how to convince him of that.

Eelim shrugged, "Ideas about my next steps. I should drop the Galan and take my real father's name, I've thought about that, in the darkest of times I've thought about having plastic surgery to remove all traces of Cardassia on the outside. So that I wouldn't offend my crewmates...but that would dishonour my mother and real father. Derat doesn't deserve that. He was the only one who encouraged my art...maybe something artistic to honour him...” He shook his had and smiled. "See, lots of disjointed ideas not a place to start." He rubbed the spoon shaped indent in his head a habit he had when frustrated, a technique Derat had used too.

"Then there are my siblings, Laga and Saul.... and thanks to a Romulan friend I discovered I have a half sister on Derat's side. A daughter that he knew nothing about either, a who's had a hard life and the last thing she'd want is her older brother coming in and complicating things farther." He looked at the counselor. "So, counselor, does all this sound crazy to you?"

"Not at all," Marisa assured him. "Those are legitimate concerns. First, about your birth father." She paused for a moment while she organized her thoughts. "If you feel strongly about it, then definitely take on your birth father's name. There is nothing that says you have to keep the name of a man you despise. I also think you should do something creative to honor your birth father. It would both show your respect and it would help you get back to something you love."

She paused again. "Don't have plastic surgery. The Dominion War is over. It's time to heal. Let people see that you are nothing like they expect. That will change people's opinions about you and about Cardassians in general. There are now half-Klingons and half-Romulans in Starfleet as well. The Federation is a conglomeration of many species. We need to embrace our differences as well as are similarities. Finally, I think you should reach out to your siblings. Let them get to know you if they wish. Even the sister you know nothing about. You don't know if she'll accept you or not until you try."

He sighed. "My siblings I haven't talked to in a long time but you are right. I should contact them again. As for the youngest.... that is a complicated story."

"I have time."

"I've known about Ella for a while. Derat took my mother's rejection hard. He asked her to leave Galan and run away with him. He then turned to a Bajoran woman who reminded him of her. She died in childbirth and her sister took the baby. She moved to Vulcan with her husband, a Cardassian artist and they raised the baby. I found out about her years ago and feeling responsible I made sure she would want for nothing. I paid for her tuition." He smiled. "She's the artist I always wanted to be."

"Do you think she might have looked into who paid for her tuition? She might already know about you. If she doesn't, she might want to know just to thank you."

He hadn't thought that she might find out. He smiled again. "Counselor you are making it very difficult for me to be somber and moody." His smile turned into a grin. "I never thought I could feel better talking to a counselor."

Marisa grinned back. "Good. Then I'm doing my job. But seriously, there are many sides to every situation. We choose which to focus on. Sometimes, just stepping back and looking from a different perspective can make all the difference. And being happy doesn't hurt anything."

"That, my counselor, is another story. There are days when I'm afraid to be happy. Galan knew all along that I wasn't his son. It was a reminder that his wife had an affair a blow to his pride even though he was dreadful to her. I'm happy she and Derat at least had a few moments of happiness, but I digress," he said. "Anyway, whenever I was happy the good Gul would always do something to make me sad. I remember he'd always say, 'Happiness is not for those that were born without honour.' I never understood that until now. So you see I always wait for the other shoe to drop when I get too happy. That is why I fear this relationship with Allyndra." He paused and looked startled. He'd said it out loud. He loved Allyndra but he feared that something would go wrong or worse yet he'd turn into Gul Galan. He shook his head sadly.

"Have you heard the Earth saying that the best revenge is living well?" Marisa asked. "I try to find something positive in every day. Sometimes it's harder than others, but I can always find something. Does Allyndra love you?"

He shrugged. "I ...I don't know. We've never talked about it fully. I know she cares a great deal," he said. "I love her."

"So tell her."

Eelim grinned. "It's just that easy huh?"

"Well, it's both that simple and that difficult," she admitted. "But if you don't try, how will you ever know what you might have? Going back to another of your arguments. If you love someone and then lose them, you will have the time you had together to remember. If you are too afraid to love, you'll lose the person anyway without the happiness to remember. So, it's worth a try."

He smiled, "I shall give it a try." He thought for a moment "So what's the next step?"

"Try some of the things I suggested. See if any of them work for you. Then come back in a few days and let me know how they went. We'll go from there," Marisa said. "If that works for you."

Eelim smiled. "Alright. I can handle that." He got up and headed towards the door. When he reached the door he turned, "Thank you counselor."

"Try a few things," Marisa said. "Then come back in a few days and let me know how it went. We'll go from there, if that's okay with you."

"I will," Eelim said. He headed out the door and back to his quarters. He had some thinking to do.

[OFF]

Lieutenant JG Marisa Sandoval
Counselor
IKS DuJa'Q

&
Lt. JG Eelim Galan
Security Officer
IKS Duja'Q
(PNPC Played by Soral Varro)

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