When all else fails....

Posted on 14 May 2012 @ 12:20am by Lieutenant Commander Pola Ni Dhuinn M.D. & Captain Jonathan Holliday

4,920 words; about a 25 minute read

Mission: Episode 01 - Project Sienna
Location: USS Galileo - XO Quarters
Timeline: MD06 0400hours

[ON]

Having headed back to her quarters, Pola was curled on her side on the bed, her legs pulled up to her chest. He'd said it again...something to write home about... Why did he keep saying that? Was home and family really that important? Was there something wrong with her that she had no home or no family to write home to? Was she making a big deal out of nothing?

Moving her body to sit at the edge of the bed, Pola stared across at the photos on her chest of drawers. She was never sure why she chose frames with glass, on her numerous postings she'd had to replace the glass so much, but it was worth it. A holograph could only show so much, a physical photo in one's hands showed so much more.

Pulling herself to her feet, Pola grab an old academy hoodie, alongside a pair of leggings and flat ballet shoes. There was one person who would give her an answer to her question...or if not at least she could hit him for bringing it up in the first place. Starting to feel better, especially at the thought of possible hitting him, Pola headed out the door. This time she hadn't got far to go, giving she had now been relocated to a senior staff quarters.

Silence....was truly golden. The XO had finished his shift on the Bridge, had followed it up with a helm lesson for Ensign Cho on the holodeck, and not a moment after his feet had made their way into the turbolift had the headache from hell decided to rear its ugly head inside his well, inside his head. It was as if he had taken a quantum torpedo to the skull, and even the deck lights seemed to be enough to cause him a degree of pain.

Having virtually limped his way to his quarters, John had practically begged the replicator some analgesia, and had consumed the small collection of tablets it had produced as fast as a rabid dog would consume a piece of meat. Sat in the darkness of his quarters, the pain was finally starting to edge away.

Stopping outside of the XO's quarters, Pola realised that she had far less confidence this time around compared to the last time she had made this trip. Folding her arms against her abdomen, the Doctor found herself very tempted to turn around and go back to her quarters but that would involve a return to the loneliness, the memories.

Moving one of her hands, Pola pressed the door chime, deciding to give it 1minute max before she turned around and went back to where she came from.

And then....it had gone. The darkness, the quiet, the relaxation that the XO had been finally managing to bask in with his headache slowly starting to waver was rudely shattered by his old enemy, the door chime. It was starting to get to the point where he was considering having Mr Quinn attack it with something on his behalf to sever it from the power systems and prevent it from ever sounding again. That said, for now, he couldn't do a lot about it.

"Ugh....computer resume ambient lighting levels"

He called out, instantly regretting it as the bright Starfleet-issue lights flooded the room in an artificial aura, offending his eyes after he had been sat in almost total darkness for the past few moments. Pulling his eyes shut almost instantaneously, he called out again.

"Computer reduce lighting to level 2!"

And with a dutiful bleep, the lights dimmed, returning to something not unlike an evening light back on Mars, a slight glow, enough to illuminate the room to see around, but not so much as to blind you. It was then he remembered the chime that had so quickly brought him back to reality.

"Come in"

Having just turned to start back to her quarters, Pola heard the door open behind her. Pausing for a moment or two, swallowing past the lump in her throat, she turned back around and entered the room. It was only when the doors behind her closed that she realised the lighting levels. Thinking she may have interrupted a romantic meal or something else, the Doctor felt the colour leave her cheeks.

"Sorry. Now must be a bad time, I can talk to you in the morning."

Turning on her heel, Pola headed back for the doors, knowing she wouldn't talk to him in the morning but she could just pass it off as having been a report or an issue that had been resolved.

"No...Its ok Doctor....I was just having an argument with the computer over light levels....my door is always open to the crew....how can I help?"

Stopping in her tracks, Pola turned around, nervously chewing on the side of her bottom lip. Now she was here, she wasn't sure that to say. She'd started to realise that this may have been a bad idea. Stepping forward, she started to excuse herself trying to make up an excuse for changing her mind but was stopped in her tracks as she got closer to Jonathan. Taking in the small details others might miss, the slight rigidity in his body which was not normal for him and the slight squint of his eyes despite the lighting.

"Are you ok?"

"Just a little headache....nothing the replicator couldn't make me up something to fix....I'll be fine in a while, guess I spent too long staring at the viewscreen during my Bridge shift"

The XO had to admit, he was slowly starting to feel better, no matter how much his head was trying to tell him that he wasn't. A headache was just one of those things that couldn't be avoided, but hopefully, now that he had managed to self-medicate the problem, it would go away and he could get back to existing in normal light levels.

Stepping closer, Pola moved down onto her hunkers taking Jonathan's chin in her fingers so she could tilt up his chin and look into his eyes.

"How long have you had it for? I don't recall any notes indicating you have issues with recurring headaches, do you self-medicate a lot?"

Cursing the fact she didn't have her tricorder with her, Pola fell back on the old reliable manual medical means for a diagnosis. Moving her hand away from his chin, Pola started to gently apply pressure around Jonathan's scalp and neck muscles, concerned he might be suffering from tension headaches which could become a long-term issue, especially when his job entailed being a XO.

"Does the pain worsen when I apply pressure?"

"Seems like I'm not the only one that finds it hard to come off duty" John laughed as he felt the pressure on his temples from Pola's hands.

"Nah, the pain is pretty much the same level, honestly Doc I'm fine, a couple of analgesic tablets and a glass of water later I'm fighting fit....trust me, if it was a medical emergency I'd have come down to Sickbay. I get the feeling you came down here for a reason other than a hunch that I might need some treatment?"

Moving back onto her heels, Pola looked into Jonathan's eyes again to try gage the level of pain he was experiencing before smiling softly.

"A Doctor's job is never done I'm afraid. If the pain doesn't lessen let me know and I'll see about giving you something stronger and if the headache are persistent I expect to hear from you. It doesn't have to be medical emergency to come see us."

Letting go of Jonathan's chin, Pola felt confident he would have enough common sense to say something if this was a bigger issue, Pola made a note to recheck the scans taken 2hours ago to ensure 100% everything was fine. Having for a few moments lost herself as the job took precedent, the Doctor found herself brought back to reality at the XO's prompt.

"It wasn't anything important. You need to rest and don't need me wrecking your head Jonathan."

"Again with the Jonathan huh Doc? I think the only people to ever call me that were my mother and a few Admirals at the Academy that liked to throw their weight around. Come on, humour me, what brings you to the XO's quarters at 4 in the morning?"

John stretched for a moment, pressing his arms outwards and feeling that somewhat pleasurable sensation as the various muscles and tendons in his arm and upper back began to expand and contract, as if he had been kept in a small box for months and had only just been allowed out. Yawning for a moment, he brought his arms back down to rest on his lap, and settled back on the sofa.

Shrugging her shoulders, Pola wrapped her arms around her waist, feeling silly for having come to Jonathan's quarters and not sure how to ask the question which had upset her. Chewing her lip, the Doctor instead concentrated on the comment about his name.

"Well in honesty Jonathan suits you better then John...well I think so anyway.."

Starting to feel foolish, Pola bit down harder on her lip, concentrating on where the XO's hands rested on his lap. Chewing on her lip, she went over why she was here, finally closing her eyes and blurting out the question.

"Why do you always say the phrase something to write home about ? What does it mean?"

"Heh...that...that's got a bit of a story behind it." John admitted a little quietly, not sure if it was just because he was tired, because he was trying to remember the exact story, or a combination of the two.

"My dad used to say it quite a lot, it was sarcastic really. He never approved of me joining the Academy, used to say that if I ever did anything useful there, then that would be something to write home about . What he really meant was he didn't want to hear from me as long as I was part of a military operation. So, I started using it myself, to get my own back as it were.....and it stuck ever since"

"So what you're saying is that anytime you say it, it's in a sarcastic matter so whatever prompts it is unimportant?"

Pola looked at Jonathan in complete and utter confusion, as she tried to comprehend his meaning. This really wasn't the right time to be talking about this. The poor man was exhausted and had a headache.

"Not at all doctor...sorry, guess my head is still a little woozy. To me it means nothing more than what it says, nothing to write home about, you know, nothing overly important, nothing out of the ordinary. No sarcasm involved...not when I say it anyways..."

Taking a second to think through the subject, John rubbed his temples with his hands, feeling his headache resurface for a second before dying back down again. It had taken a few minutes, but at least now he could feel the medication he had taken starting to do its job, and for that, he was grateful.

"Bit of an odd request there Doctor....not often I get quizzed on my choice of words?"

Watching Jonathan, Pola frowned slightly before walking over to the replicator, bringing up the display in order to replicate one of her own pre-programmed remedies. Taking out the bottle, the Doctor moved to sit beside her XO on the couch, holding it out for him to take.

"Give this a try. Rub it into the back of your neck and also your temples. It's just an oil containing a subtle amount of a plant called lavender. It'll ease the pain until your painkillers kick in."

Medical advice in the near darkness, on his sofa, during his time off. It wasn't exactly standard Starfleet medical procedure, but at the end of the day there was far worse that could happen, at least now he was in the comfort of his own surroundings whilst he slowly started to feel a little better. Taking the bottle, he nodded to his colleague and placed it on the table. Looking at it for a moment, he felt like resisting and leaving the so-called "traditional" remedies out of the way to make room for modern science, but eventually he relented.

Picking up the small bottle and shaking out a small quantity onto the flat palm of his hand, he applied it as instructed. It was odd to use something for medicinal purposes that had a scent as far as he was concerned, but if it worked, then it worked.

"Folk remedies huh? I bet the arboretum loves you!"

Leaning back against the couch, Pola found herself smiling as she took in the full situation. 0400hours in the morning, trying to cure the headache her XO was suffering from in the middle of a dimmed lighted room. It might have been funny in any other situation. Watching Jonathan apply the oil, Pola suddenly found the words.

"I don't have a home."

Realising what she'd blurted out, Pola found her face became flushed. "Sorry that came out wrong...well not wrong, just very sudden."

"Doctor last time I checked we'd assigned you quarters?" John replied with an initial onset of humour in his voice. It was of course impossible that any officer on any starship in the fleet would not have somewhere to stay, in fact being assigned quarters was one of the first things done at any new posting.

"Or did someone make an oversight and you've been sleeping in Sickbay since we left spacedock?"

Blushing further, Pola found it difficult to keep the smile away. "Well there was a few issues with getting moved to senior quarters, but yes, I have quarters..mind you I seem to be spending more time here and in sickbay then there."

Moving forward in her seat, the Doctor recapped the bottle and started to roll it between her hands, watching the motions. "I mean that I have no home to write home to."

"This is true...my open door policy appears to be there to be abused, one of the perils of being the First Officer I suppose....what do you mean no home to write home to? You're from Earth originally right? Last time I checked it was still there?"

Looking down at the bottle closer, Pola started to realise this may have been a bad idea. She was bothering Jonathan, the man deserved some downtime, this is why ship's had counsellors. Smiling slightly, the Doctor tried to find a way to recover from this. "You know you love me dropping by, I mean you'd be bored otherwise and you'd miss out on medical care. How's the headache now?"

Having focused his efforts these last few minutes on listening to the conversation that was developing between him and the CMO, John had to admit that he hadn't really been paying much attention to his head and the pain that was there. It seemed to him at least, the medication he had taken was starting to do its work.

"Better thanks...see, modern medicine wins again....it means I'm well enough to notice when someone is avoiding a question?"

Laughing Pola say back against the back of the couch and angled her body towards Jonathan, holding up the small bottle, "Modern medicine or herbal remedies? Even the most modern of Doctors have to bow down to herbal remedies sometimes."

Smiling across at her XO, Pola thought over the question he'd asked. "Well I haven't checked in recently but I'll go with you on the assumption that Earth is still there. I was raised by my Grandmother who passed away a number of years ago. By default, that would mean I have no home."

"Ahh...my condolences....a few years late however"

John felt a little guilty for having dug so deeply into one of his officer's pasts without having express permission. There was no reason for him to have wanted to know more, but something told him that it was going to be beneficial for him to look a little deeper at the situation. He was no stranger to not having any substantial ties to home, but at least for now, he still had his parents.

"I...didn't mean to pry"

Shaking her head, Pola smiled sadly across at Jonathan. "Na it was my fault. I let your words get to me and then I left the door wiiiiide open." Looking back down at her hands, the Doctor now felt the if door was open the rest should come out.

"I'm lucky, both my parents are alive but I haven't seen or heard from them since the funeral. They made it clear at a very young age that they wanted nothing to do with me and enforced the decision. Last I heard, they were dispatched on the USS Lincoln on a deep space voyage." Smiling suddenly Pola looked over at Jonathan, "Your job spec really doesn't include part time counsellor does it?"

"Not unless it's something you can solve with a phaser or a torpedo launcher, sadly not....I'm not exactly a subtle kind of guy....more shoot first and ask questions later. My job is to maintain order and discipline aboard ship...anything beyond that, well there's another department for that..."

"But you forget, sometimes a friend is better than a stranger...even if you don't know that person very well." Folding her arms across her chest, Pola tilted her head to the side. "So if that's how you handle situations, what about your senior officers? What would you do if they had issues and needed your advice?"

"I'd direct them to the appropriate section of Starfleet protocol for senior officers" John said in a very direct and matter-of-fact tone. He was well aware that he would often be called upon to mediate disputes, advise the other officers aboard, and when necessary, assume command, but that didn't mean that he was about to let this post become overly friendly and sociable to those who served under him.

"There isn't a situation in the universe that hasn't already been experienced and an appropriate protocol devised...you'd be surprised how often that rule book comes in handy"

Thinking over Jonathan's words, Pola just watched him for a few moments. The conversation about people and situations came to her mind. She's known that the XO was very analytical, he himself admitted he viewed danger first and foremost before he view anything else. The Doctor went to say something more but stopped for a moment uncertain before continuing.

"Sometimes a human element must come into it also. I've two patients right now where procedures and rule books would demand I relieve them from duty but that would cause us to be down two people we can't afford. Instead I look at the people concerned and find ways to be able to resolve the situation with everyone benefitting. One case may yet result in a declaration of being unfit but until then we are working on it."

"Well Doc, I'm no doctor, but I'm sure that you have it under control....just don't let me have crewmen walking the decks that are likely to make a mistake in the middle of unfriendly territory ok? That's the last thing I need right now!"

It was more than normal for John, as the XO, to receive status reports from his legion of senior officers, each transferring their knowledge of the ship to his own memory in an effort to make it as easy as possible for him to make command decisions that would otherwise require the input of their CO. In the middle of a mission, small nuances of starship life such as crew duty rosters and repair orders really didn't need to be passed across the highest desk on the ship.

"I suspect a few things like that are going to come up on this mission, we have a lot of very green crew in the junior ranks....who are going to learn very quickly that what they told them at the Academy isn't always true"

Rubbing her hands across her face, Pola took in the words both of comment and of advice. "When people start questioning the judgement of their Doctor, choosing instead what they've learned and researched themselves...It would be like me walking up to you and telling you how to do your job and dictating to you what you've to report to the Captain. Or the people who injury themselves so badly it's easy to see something's wrong but yet they continue to ignore the fact that they need urgent medical treatment."

Sitting back in her chair, Pola focused back in on Jonathan, now her thoughts were running wild, "How do you do it Jonathan? Separating the human element from the technical elements?"

For a few moments, John said nothing, keeping his expression as blank as it would have been should he find himself negotiating with a room full of Klingons bearing disruptors. He had never really thought too much on his command style, it had just...happened. Ever since that first class at the Academy on command requirements, John had never thought it could be done any other way, fraternising beyond the required levels for shipboard efficiency just made very little sense to him inside a work environment.

"I guess...it's just the way I am. I'm here to do a job, not necessarily be everyone's friend...I couldn't work efficiently otherwise. Command is just like an equation...you know what everyone is good at, their weaknesses too, and then you just need to assign them to tasks in the optimum configuration....simple really"

Resting her hand against Jonathan's arm, Pola squeezed slightly, "Maybe I should give some of the training you've been through a try. Might help to harden me into not being worried about people's physical emotions and prioritising their physical health and wellbeing over their mental. After all, what is a person without their body and their physical health? Right?"

"Haha, might be difficult to do that out here....advanced tactical training on Titan, survival training on Mars...we're a fair distance from those courses. That said...some of the command training modules are pretty useful, the Academy tends to keep things like that fairly consistent to ensure the same calibre of graduate"

John tried not to react to the feeling of another officer touching his arm. It was not something he was used to, and generally tried to avoid physical contact outside of either rendering medical aid, or combat. Looking down at her hand, John tensed the muscles in his forearm and moved away a fraction, trying to not make it look too much like he was outside of his comfort zone.

"Perhaps when this mission is finished you could request some time to attend a few classes? I can't imagine it would be much of a problem to get it authorised by Command?"

Noticing the tightening under her hand and how Jonathan shifted his body, Pola quickly pulled her hand away. It had been a natural reaction, her job was spent day in, day out touching people. She wondered if she'd done something wrong. Jonathan had held her in more personal instances, especially when they'd been dancing and he hadn't reacted like this.

Feeling slightly hurt, Pola fixed a smile on her face as if everything was the way it should be. "Well given you're Command, Commander, is that a yes.. It will be approved? Have you any recommendations on the courses I should focus on?"

"Well, I'd have to think on it, but if a member of the crew wants to use some of her downtime for study, then who am I to say no?"

John replied with a wry smile on his face. He knew full well the state of the current Academy courses, and also knew that they were as rewarding as they were demanding on the students that attended them. That said, he personally felt that the lessons he had learned from that particular segment of his training were some of the best that he had ever experienced.

"Well, the basic command outlines are always worth a shot....pretty much Starfleet command roles for dummies ...then if you fancy something a little more...well, cold....then I'd take a look at some of the Tactical assignments for the first and second year cadets....you learn a few things about yourself on those."

Pola wrapped her arms around her abdomen, listening to Jonathan's suggestions and filing them away for future reference. About to ask a question about the suggested courses, the Doctor found when she opened her mouth the correct words didn't materialise.

"If you're so detached how do you manage to waltz so well. Waltzing is more than counting the steps. It's about a passion, an enjoyment. You can't be overly stiff or set aside as then you lose what the dance is about. I'm not sure anyone I've danced with before managed it as well as you did."

"Ah...that....well that particular gift is one from my mother....she thought it necessary that I have at least some idea of how to move in the more...formal...dance forms on Earth, not that I ever have to really use them outside of the occasional holodeck jaunt with a CMO who won't take no for an answer.....that's...not my usual idea of relaxing"

Impulsively getting to her feet, Pola held out her hand, "Dance one with me now, this place is certainly big enough if you keep your steps small to manage it and let's not forget, you just said your CMO never takes no for an answer."

"I....don't think so Doc...I just got off duty, my head is still sore...the last thing I want to do is dance....sorry to be rude but....First Officer's prerogative I guess...."

John genuinely didn't want to appear rude, he was already extremely tired from his shift, not to mention having given instruction on the finer points of starship piloting to a younger officer, which had drained him mentally. He had no trouble teaching young Ensign Cho the ropes when it came to the CONN, but he still found that after focusing his mind on something for so long, he really didn't have the energy for much else.

Shrugging her shoulders Pola smiled slightly, some of her hyperness having now disappeared. "It's all right. You should probably get some sleep anyway, nothing better than the final cure for a headache, plenty of rest. I'm sure I can find a willing partner on the holodeck, if not then sure I can always explore the ship, see if there's places I haven't managed to wander into yet."

In all honesty, Pola couldn't face being on her own right now. It was part of the reason shed come to see Jonathan as she knew if she was left alone with her thoughts and memories then she'd only become more upset over analysing everything. It hadn't been fair on her thought to bother Jonathan like this, he deserved his own space and she realised it'd be a while before she dropped in on him again, it wouldn't be fair to keep doing this.

"Make sure you give me a shout if the headache isn't gone by morning Jonathan."

"Yes ma'am" John replied with a humorous smile on his face. He was particularly glad that she hadn't forced the issue and dragged him to his feet. It was difficult for him to remain tactful and respectful when he was exactly this tired, and it had taken a huge effort from him to not lose his cool and eject someone from his quarters when they had shown up unannounced in the middle of the night.

"If not you know where I am"

Unable to understand his last comment, Pola just shrugged her shoulders and headed for the door, figuring it was best to just leave it at that, there wasn't anything more to be said, before hitting the pad to open the door, she turned to look over her shoulder.

"Sweet dreams Jonathan."

And with that, Pola opened the doors and left, keeping her head down so no one she passed could see the tears. She wasn't certain why she was crying, all she knew is that she couldn't stop the feeling to need to cry. Maybe it was the memories brought up, maybe it was the lack of sleep, or maybe there was something else wrong, in all honesty she didn't know. All she knew is she was heading for her quarters, maybe the sleep would help.

Left alone in his quarters once again, John picked the combadge from his chest, looking down at the emblem of Starfleet that every officer wore and respected, the silver and gold shimmering in the half-light of his quarters. Sighing, he levered himself from the couch and headed towards the bedroom, letting the combadge fall from his hand onto the bedside table as he started to undress and contemplate the events of the last few minutes.

[OFF]

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Lt Cmdr. Jonathan Holliday
Executive Officer
USS Galileo

Lieutenant JG Pola Ni Dhuinn
Chief Medical Officer
USS Galileo

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