Broken Things

Posted on 31 May 2018 @ 3:15pm by Petty Officer 3rd Class Constantin Vansen

274 words; about a 1 minute read

Sometimes I don't think all the broken things can be fixed...

People aren't like an engine. They're not like a cracked hull. People aren't a malfunctioning replicator.

People are organic. Organic things break down too and sometimes you can't see the damage. It hides itself, deep, deep inside. Because an organic will keep on marching on, each step staggering, each heavy heartbeat pumping the blood around.

There's whole professions dedicated to fix the broken organics. Whole teams of people who try and patch them together, to glue them together, to fuse jagged pieces. It's fascinating.

Sometimes, I think I am a piece of the puzzle, but it is a different puzzle and my edges don't fit. I try to shape them to fit in, to walk like them, to gesture like them. But it slips, it keeps slipping so frequently.

Organics are complicated.

People are complicated.

I don't know how I got so complicated. I wasn't. It was me and the ship and my Captain and my XO and space, so much space. It was beautiful, stretched out, floating in it. Floating in all of it. No personalities to adjust to, no people to work with.

But as much as I sometimes want to curl up away from it, being alone is worse. Alone the thoughts come.

I am not right. I was broken from a young age.

They only come when I am alone though. With people I enjoy myself, I enjoy all that they have shown me, everything I have been taught.

But I still don't think that all broken things can be fixed. Not anymore.

RSS Feed