Miraj Derani Personal Log #6

Posted on 28 Aug 2016 @ 9:12pm by Ensign Miraj Derani

369 words; about a 2 minute read

Galileo Day 52

Live Flight hours 129
Sim Hours 93

Finally! we're back in space! Finally!
Its been so hard, squatting on the ground and sitting still and not being able to go anywhere or do anything, and now we're back where there's nothing to hold us down or pull us back, nothing but the infinite expanse of space in all its beauty. We hate being planetside

Now we're back in space, I'm sleeping again. Its just not the same without the vvvrrrr at night.

I'm supposed to be doing stuff with Lieutenant Wyatt to not be so useless if something like Celes IV happens again, but things keep happening and he keeps putting it back. He said he always keeps his word, but it feels like everything is conspiring against it. Maybe its the universe warning me off. After all, He's a Lieutenant so he's a superior officer, and he's like, what? Mal's age, so I'm younger by years!

I don't know why i'm so ... I don't know. He said he wanted to get to know me, and then he did this really nice thing where he put fairy lights up in the shuttle to make me feel at home, and i thought it might be a date and there were several times when I thought something would happen, and then it didn't so I guess i'm just reading more into it than there is. Besides he has, had, a daughter. By the time he was my age, he must have been a dad. And I haven't... I mean I'm still...

He's got experience, and wit and intelligence and he's really built. I mean really built. Muscles only get that definied in like, anatomy textbooks and the like. And there's like, tons of women on this ship. and they're all beautiful and exotic. Why would he even look twice at me, when he could have anyone or them, all prettier than I am, and actually know what they're doing, and how to....and stuff. How do I even compete with that. I have to concentrate to tie my shoelaces.

I'm just going to pull myself together, concentrate on getting my hours, and not look for things that can't possibly be there.

:(

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