Too Much

Posted on 15 Jan 2013 @ 11:24pm by Lieutenant Kiri Cho & Lieutenant Theron Rhodes
Edited on on 16 Jan 2013 @ 1:14am

2,925 words; about a 15 minute read

Mission: Episode 02 - Resupply
Location: USS Galileo Deck 3, Lieutenant Cho's Quaters,
Timeline: MD 14 2015 hours

ON:

Kiri had dimmed the lights a little more, this way she could hide herself. Since Maenad had left she hadn't moved from the sofa, crying by herself over frustration, fear, that she might had failed and a host of other things she'd buried inside herself. After a few minutes and several jagged breaths she came to a stop, she was crushingly lonely now. She had to do something, be near somebody. Standing up she washed her face, scrubbing so hard her skin turned red. That done and her hair fixed she stood in the middle of the room, red eyes still welling tears that didn't run. "Cho to Lieutenant Rhodes," Her voice was shaken and weak. Kiri tried her best to control it but it didn't work, "Are you busy?"

Walking down the passageway on Deck 6, checking on security points, Theron stopped and stepped to the side as he tapped his comm, =^=Lt. Rhodes here. What might I do for you Lt. Cho?=^= Theron was pleased to hear from her. It had been a day or so since he had spoken to her. He was not sure, but she sounded a little uncertain. He was on duty, but could make time if it was important.

Kiri didn't really know what to say, now she as speaking she wanted to start crying again, "I, um," Deep breath, "Would, I mean, could I come over and talk to you?" Talking seemed like a good idea though she was getting more and more scared of it as the seconds passed.

Theron thought for a second and then looked around to see who might hear their conversation. He replied, "Of course. I am on duty at the moment, but could take a break." then he smiled at a phrase to say tha he had heard many times, but never used himself until now, "Your place or mine?"

She didn't want to interrupt him, to cause him a problem but, who else could she call? The thought of inviting him here seemed like it might be a bad idea but to walk across the ship like this? What if she ran into Maenad or Kiwosk? Choking back on her fear she half mumbled, "Is my quarters closer?" Was she inflicting herself on him? Taking advantage of him, was she being stupid, childish, mean, weak? This wasn't helping.

Theron heard some hesitation and uncertainty in her voice. The best answer would be that he was around the corner, but he was on Deck 6. "I am less than a minute away." He stretched the truth.

The ship wasn't very big. A hundred and forty meters at its longest point, if he was two decks down it would take a second in the turbo lift, maybe twenty seconds of walking. Kiri was starting to panic, was he further away than he said, was he in the middle of something. Maybe she shouldn't have called, was she asking to much. A tear started to roll down her cheek and her chest tighten again, hunching over with her hands to her stomach she tried to breath. Time seemed to zip by and before she knew it the door chimed.

It really only had taken about 45 seconds to get to Kiri's quarters thanks to the turbolift being so close. During that time also, Theron had notified the security crewman on duty that he would be unavailable for a while, and only contact him if there was a priority situation or the Captain.

Arriving at her door he pressed the chime and then automatically glanced down at himself to see if he was presentable. He typically did this when reporting to a senior officer and also did it unconciously when going on a date. He realized he had donet his and was slightly stunned with the obvious.

Her face rather red still, her eyes puffy and carried the fact she had been crying like a badge of honour. Forcing a sad smile she spoke in a broken voice, "Thank you." The room was fairly dim, two bowls of rice and pork sat on a small table next to the sofa. Otherwise the room was completely bare, every surface empty other than a picture that leant against a wall.

"It was not an inconvience." Theron said as he stepped into the room. "See? It did not take long as all." Smiling he looked about the room and found it bare. No. Bare was an over statement. It was empty of anything that helped one understand who Kiri was. Yet that in itself told volumes.

Shuffling aside to let him in she bowed her head. She didn't know what she was going to do next, she knew what she wanted, but that was impossible. She'd already messed up one friendship in the last hour, there was no way she could do the same to this one too. "Would you, like, something to eat or dri, drink?" Suppressing a sob she stood upright and tried to bury what she was feeling, it wouldn't move though.

Trying not to make a big deal from her emotions, Theron said "Did I interrupt a meal you were having wih someone?"

"No," Answering in rather forlorn voice, "I, think I made Maenad angry, she left." A shudder coursed though her body and she wobbled on the spot. Her legs started going numb as she started walking towards the sofa, she needed to sit down.

"I see." Theron said looking at Kiri and then at the table again. Smiling at Kiri in her obvious weakened state, "How about we sit down and let me get you something. Eh?"

Kiri did sit down, perching on the edge of the sofa, but she shook her head, "I don't need anything." There was already food she didn't feel like eating and she'd had some tea not so long ago. She was starting to feel uncomfortable about this, shooting him a glance through her loose hair.

Theron made a slight grimace of smile, slightly uncertain of his next move, and walked to the side of her and sat on the sofa about 30 cm from her. He attempted an observing comment, "I see that you have been upset. We do not have to talk about it. We can talk about whatever you care to share . . . or just sit here quietly." He hoped the comment would let her understand that he had no set agenda and she could be free to speak what she wanted to share.

Kiri remained silent, looking first at her knees and then at the table again. Now she had him here she didn't know what she wanted, was it just to have someone nearby to hold her together? To have someone to talk to about what happened? A shuddered crossed her back, cramped her shoulders and made her let out a gasp. "Thank you," Before she could say anything else she started to cry again, forcefully rubbing her eyes with her fists.

He gently placed his hand on back, stroking down slowly. Then doing it again slowly. He finally said softly, "You are alright. You are safe here." Thereon knew he was no psychologist, but he did know not to try to fix her, but just try to comfort her and be there for his friend. "You can cry if you want. It is okay." Stroking her back one more time.

"It's not okay, I shouldn't cry," She scolded herself. At first she didn't notice his hand on her back through her jacket, tunic and vest, when she did she didn't flinch away. Was that what she wanted, a physical, emotional validation? In her world she might have just lost someone who was maybe going to be her best friend on the ship. Did she want to be assured that wouldn't happen? For several minutes she fought against crying, stopping with sobs and a wobbling chin. Finally in a broken voice she asked quietly, "Do you like me?"

Theron smiled a little and stated gently, but factually, "Kiri. You are my friend. And yes I like you." There could have been a long explaination of the level of like and trust, but this was not the moment. He lowered his left hand and presented his right hand, palm up, in front of her. "In my culture, physical contact is looked down upon. Only in a close relationship is touch welcomed. This is my hand of friendship. And even if you commit a savage or unforgivable crime, I still will be your friend."

In her culture it was as well. Kiri sighed and looked at his palm, that was a very nice thing he said. She didn't know that she would still be his friend if he did something like that, was he telling the truth? Was she meant to take it? What about how he had touched her before? Very nervously she lifted her own shaking right hand and held it over his, not touching it. Looking to him she sucked down on her cheeks, "I," Very quiet now, "Than, k, you. I." It made her feel somewhat better, that she wasn't so terrible at making friends.

In one way he wanted to reach out to her, but on the other hand he did not want to push the situation beyond a stable friendship relationship. He continued to hold his palm up at her. The next step was hers to make. He held his slight smile, looking directly at her with concern in his eyes. However, she probably could not see him anyway, since her head was down in such despair.

Her stomach felt like it was spasming. For a moment she focused on that before looking to him, wondering why he was silent. Her green eyes rested on his for a moment and without thinking she placed her palm against his. "Sorry for being like this," She was starting to recover now, but it still felt bad inside.

Theron's smile grew just slightly when her palm rested in his. He did not close his hand upon hers. He felt that would send the wrong message. "I understand. Do not worry about it. I know you are hurt inside. I am here when you are ready to share. Until then, we need to cheer you up a little."

Kiri didn't much feel like cheering up but she did feel better, even a little hungry as her eyes passed over the bowl on the table. Should she speak, should she not? What should she do? Right now she just felt stupid, acting like a child.

"Well," Theron hesitated, but then said, "I had scheduled some holodeck time at the end of my shift. Would that interest you?"

Looking uncertain she nodded, trying to take stock of the time, "That is quite late?" Her voice was still broken and now a little dry. It was almost half past eight, she shouldn't be staying up too late.

"I understand." Theron was quiet for a moment or so, "So . . " looking around the room. With a touch of sarcasm, "I love what you have done with the place."

"I haven't done anything," Kiri answered rather bluntly, looking up herself at the room, "Not yet." She scrunched up her eyes for a few seconds and took several deep breaths, "I would like to go, another time."

Theron looked back at her confused for a second, "Oh, you mean the holodeck." Smiling he added, "Sure. We can do that anytime."

"Yes," Slowly she was starting to get back to normal, "I would like that," Her breathing was still a little shaky. She was starting to feel rather cold now, her shiver was from that instead. Then it hit her, "I almost forgot sorry." Standing up she left his hand and disappeared towards the bedroom for a moment.

Theron was rather startled by this change in Kiri. A good change, to say the least, but he was confused. Standing, he looked toward the bedroom, "Forgot? Forgot what?"

Curing her deflation slightly Kiri reappeared with a sheathed sword in hand. The sheath was black and plain with just a few hopes for hanging on it. Holding it out she tried and failed to force a smile, "I didn't have a chance to give this to you."

Theron reached out tentively, touching the sheth, but not taking it. "You . . you had the Romulan sword replicated? That is so AWESOME." He could not help but get excited.

"Umhu," Kiri nodded, "It's an exact copy," Would creating a gift for Maenad be the best way to fix whatever she had done today? But time was getting short, however lonely she was feeling she shouldn't get Theron in trouble when he should be on duty.

Grasping the sheath firmly with his left hand and taking a firm grip of the handle with his right, he pulled the blade slowly out of the sheath. Light gleamed from the exposed blade. "It is like new." Theron said softly, then looking into Kiri's eyes, "Thank you. Thank you so much." He felt a little confused with his emotions. Part of him wanted to reach up and hug her, part of him felt the old pangs of keeping his distance, and he was concerned about not reacting the wrong way for Kiri.

"You are welcome," When she smiled for real this time her eyes relaxed and they started to well up slightly. Covering her nose with her free hand and shifted before wiping them both, "I know you wanted to keep it," At least she thought she did. "I shouldn't keep you," She still didn't know what she wanted from him. Whether it was just his company, someone to talk to, someone to hold her. This room was still big and lonely though, and empty.

Keep me? he thought. Theron glanced at the time. "Oh, yes. I guess I should get back to my duties." He again glanced down at the blade and then at Kiri. Theron thought that she did seem a little better off emotionally than when he had first arrived. "You seem a bit better. Will you be alright by yourself?"

No. "Yes," Was there a choice? There wasn't anyone else she felt comfortable being around right now. She didn't want to be alone in a big room that only served to remind her how alone she was. He had to get back to his duty, Kiri couldn't change that.

Theron looked about the very empty room and then said to Kiri, "I realize that you may rather want to stay here and not be around anyone." He let that hang in the air, then added with an encouraging smile, "I would suggest that you go for a walk about the ship. You would not have to go and be with anyone, just walk the passageways of the desks. At this time of the evening, there would not be as many personnel out, but you might find something interesting to see or do."

Kiri thought for a moment, maybe that was a good idea? She didn't wanted anyone else to see her like this though. There was also the matter that she hadn't eaten for a while. Trying to sound cheerier, "I will, when I've had something to eat, will you be out there?"

Theron smiled smiled and said encouragingly, "I will be looking." Then held up his hand toward her, palm facing her, with fingers spread. "On my homeworld this is how we wave goodbye. Associates or aquantances hold up their hand in response. The closer the hands come, the closer the relationship. close friends touch hands and . . " Theron blushed a little and added, "lovers interlace the fingers." It was very bold of him to explain all of this, but he thought that this would give Kiri the opportunity to express how she felt about their relationship.

Kiri looked rather startled. Was he just explaining this or was there something else, why would there be anything else? They had gone on a walk together, they had watched a sunset together, he was here, he was her friend wasn't he? There was that moment but he wouldn't, she didn't know him that well. As she reached her hand up she thought of the last thing like this she learnt, that was for hello though. Small cold finger tips dabbed on his for a second, slipping to the side and then, retreating. Kiri could feel herself turning slightly red but at least she wasn't thinking of Maenad any more. "Take care," Her voice was almost back to normal now but she couldn't look him in the eye.

Theron so much appreciated her honesty, and to herself. From this touch, Theron felt that Kiri wanted to be his friend and possibly more. He lowered his hand to his side and smiled, even though she could not see it. "Be well, my friend." With that said, he turned and walked out of her quarters and did not turn back to see her response.

She watched him go as her cheeks faded, there were things to do now. Her mind had something to focus on, she needed to eat something, then take a shower. Then walking around the decks for a while, she didn't know if she would find anything or find him. It was indeed better than being here on her own though.

OFF:


Lieutenant (JG) Kiri Cho
Assistant Chief Science Officer
USS Galileo

Lieutenant (JG) Theron Rhodes
Assistant Chief Security Officer
USS Galileo

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