Bosom Buddies

Posted on 07 Oct 2014 @ 11:30am by Seleya Qellar Ph.D.

1,248 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: Episode 06 - Legend of Souls
Location: Starfleet HQ, Office of Science Operations, Earth
Timeline: MD10: 0948 hrs

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The face in the viewscreen was not Lieutenant Commander Fioraso of the civilian scientists program at Starfleet's Office of Science Operations. He'd evidently passed her off to some low-ranking functionary. It irritated her, but it was just as well because an ensign was a lot easier to ride roughshod over. Living almost her entire life in a fairly homogeneous society meant she wasn't a very good judge of age among non-Romulans but this particular Human clearly looked like he'd just graduated from the Academy yesterday. And that was even better, really.

"Dr. Qellar?" he asked, tone indicating it was a fairly rhetorical question; obviously he'd read her file and seen her picture. "I'm Lieutenant Commander Fioraso's aide, Ensign Darzen Jonyr. How are you this morning?"

Ugh, one of those, she thought. Seleya stared at him for a long moment, passive and unblinking. She was growing to loathe these face-to-face encounters that permeated the Federation, always with a smile. In the Romulan Star Empire, everything was significantly more efficient: short messages that got to the point, no pleasantries and definitely no need to see one another. Because who had time for such luxuries when you were trying to conquer the stars? Naturally, she answered in a tone that implied little patience for how-do-you-dos. "I'm very well, thank you for asking, Ensign Jonyr. Is there a purpose behind this call?"

"Yes, of course," he replied without skipping a beat, obviously prepared for her abrasive attitude by his superior. "We're very pleased to offer you a position as a biotechnologist within Starfleet, effective immediately. You should be receiving your paperwork shortly assigning you to the USS Calhoun-"

"The Calhoun?"

"Uh, yes, ma'am," Jonyr stumbled, clearly not anticipating that he'd be thrown off script. "That's what the paper-"

"The Calhoun is a Miranda-class vessel, ensign, and I am not serving on a Miranda-class vessel. If I wanted to live among some ancient floating garbage heap I would have applied for service aboard a Farian cargo freighter. You do not assign a person of my stature and expertise to a ship held together by a hope and a prayer with science facilities so inadequate that a primary school student couldn't complete a science fair project in them. No, this is absolutely unacceptable. I specifically requested the Galileo, and I am at a loss as to why that was overlooked by your office."

"Well, Lieutenant Commander Fioraso felt-"

"Excuse me? He felt? Are you a scientist or a counselor, ensign?" Seeing he was already reeling, she leaned closer to the monitor and pressed. "I require scientific facilities of sufficient size and sophistication to carry out my research. Do you understand the implications for the health and well-being of Federation colonists? Am I supposed to engineer crops suited to harsh environments in a cramped laboratory on board an aging starship?" Seleya paused, leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. Two seconds passed before she snapped at him. "Well? On what grounds was my request denied?"

Ensign Jonyr jumped. "Um, well, I wasn't exactly privy to that discussion but I'm sure Lieutenant Commander Fioraso could explain his decision if-"

"Yes, get him on the line," Seleya said dismissively, flicking a hand through the air. "I'd like to speak to someone with some actual authority."

Jonyr's brow knit together in frustration, looking like his pride had been wounded. "But he's in a meeting at the moment. I'm sure I could-"

"Oh, he's in a meeting at the moment," she parroted, throwing her hands in the air as if the whole thing was a lost cause. "Do you feel I'm unacquainted with this system? I've lived in the Federation for 13 years; I know how this plays out. In an hour he'll be in another meeting, then he'll be at lunch, then he'll have gone home early; tomorrow, he'll be in meetings all morning and then no one will be available to take my call in the afternoon. By the time I actually speak to him, I'll be jammed into a supply closet on the Calhoun trying to make a strain of wheat for the proposed colony on planet HH374-A using substandard subduction wiring, a magnifying glass and Starfleet emergency rations left over from the Dominion War. Un-ac-ceptable." She made a show of beginning to pack things into her handbag in plain view. "I'm getting on the next planetary transport to San Francisco, and I'll take this matter up with Commodore Zihav myself. If you think I'm going to just let it go...oh, then you've mistaken me entirely, Ensign Jonyr."

"Uhhh," the ensign stuttered, voice taking on the timbre of panic.

The commodore in charge of science ops was well known for being extremely critical, short-tempered and impatient with minor administrative matters - he was a Tellarite, after all - and Jonyr had little doubt that Dr. Qellar could bully her way into his office eventually. It would be hard to tell whether Zihav would be furious with the Romulan scientist, Fioraso's office or both; either way it wouldn't be good for the young officer's new career.

While he watched the woman stuff item after item into the small clutch, his mind raced to piece together a solution. Her file showed her to be an exemplary scientist, just a difficult person (as he was beginning to see). Lieutenant Commander Fioraso, his boss, had denied her Galileo request and placed her on the Calhoun over what he imagined was some personal beef from their interview; there was nothing in her file to suggest otherwise. What harm could possibly come from changing the assignment? It looked like the Galileo was due to be near the Romulan Neutral Zone, and a real Romulan would surely be helpful... Fioraso was unlikely to inquire about it, having already moved on to the backlog of civilian scientists seeking to work with Starfleet. Their office was concerned almost exclusively with reviewing candidates; they'd likely never hear from her again, and oversight was another office entirely. Besides, it was his job as Fioraso's aide to make sure the day-to-day operations of the program functioned smoothly, wasn't it?

"Um, I could probably," Ensign Jonyr began, still sounding a little uncertain.

"You could probably what?" Seleya asked. She'd stopped getting her things together for the moment and was staring intently at him, eyes fiery within the darkness cast by the over-sized hat she'd chosen for the day.

"I could probably review the decision about the Galileo, ma'am? And see what can be done...uh... There's really no need to bring the commodore into things, I'm sure."

Seleya's eyes went wide in a well-crafted approximation of surprise, as if she'd never guessed such an outcome was possible. "If there's anyone to be counted on for discretion, Ensign Jonyr, it's a Romulan," she said, winking. "Consider us...bosom buddies."

Jonyr thought there was something slightly evil about the way the smile unfolded across her face, the way she leaned in closer to the monitor, the way her chin came to rest on her hand as she stared at him. She was smiling, but her eyes weren't. The whole thing gave him the impression that he may have just made a deal with the devil.

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Seleya Qellar, Ph.D.
Biotechnologist
USS Galileo
[ PNPC - Mott ]

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